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Can't Decide?

Updated: Feb 16, 2020

Indecision is a program of the mind gone viral... And making a decision doesn't stop it.


Indecision is a program of the mind gone viral. The program is initiated by us and stops only when we stop it. Sadly most of us don’t know it is a program, that it is running or how to stop it. By design, the program itself does not decide. Deciding does not stop the program. Indecision continues to run in the form of regret, second guessing and searching for proof long after a decision is made. That said, certainty is not required to quit it, dispensing with fear is.

We are all familiar with the coding language and incessant output of the indecisive program. mainly the endless churning of lists of pros and cons. We are also all too familiar with the painful output of this dysfunctional indecisive program: self doubt, procrastination, regret, shirking of responsibility, and compounded fear.

Fear initiates the program and keeps it running and in doing so increases itself - fear begets fear. This program is self perpetuating, it has no off button and so it cycles. By default, we initiate indecision because of our sagging self trust. Obviously, if we do not trust ourselves, we do not want to be making decisions. The program continues to wreak havoc as our inability to trust ourselves morphs into wariness of others. As our sense of self worth systematically erodes, sadness, irritability and anger dominate, erupting at various points throughout our day - seemingly beyond our ability to control.

The indecision program has us drowning in fear. We are afraid lest we be impulsive, afraid of regret, afraid to choose, afraid not to. We ascribe to the assumptions of the program, that there is a 'right and wrong' decision. While we think we want to be decisive, we rarely are. Instead we let the indecision program run on ad infinitum, lulling us into inertia all because we are literally petrified of making the wrong.

I am sure you have come to realize in your own life that the indecision program is limited, no longer serves us and is monumentally outdated. What most don’t realize is that is predicated on a slew of flawed assumptions. The good news is we can update our operating system. The new operating system that we are going to install is TRUST.

TRUST is based on the universal truths below.

  • Truth: There is no right or wrong decision.

  • Truth: No moment is better than any other moment. All moments are equal.

  • Truth: The past and the future do not exist - thus neither can regret or guilt.

  • Truth: There are no consequences just new moments of experience to experience.

  • Truth: There are no big or small decisions, they are all the same. Just flow, movement and experience, nothing more.

The TRUST program knows that we all are universally loved and supported. Happiness is our natural state, our only purpose and our happiness is universe's singular aim. This is what is meant by “God’s will (aka our happiness), is our will.” We all want the same thing.

TRUST is never indecisive so technically it creates only ‘pro’ lists. Nothing else exists. When fear flares, when we are on the cusp of resuscitating the old indecision program from the virtual trash bin, we move into TRUST. We may not know what to do necessarily but we know that all is well because the universe has our back.

I love the adage, "when in doubt, DON'T." Doubt is a fearful state and no decision coming from doubt breeds anything but judgement, intense scrutiny and the need for constant proof that we made the right decision. Interestingly, in the old paradigm, when we are looking for proof of whether or not we made the right decision, we look for what is wrong. How can looking for what is wrong ever lead to anything good?? But that is for another blog…

So, ‘should I end my marriage?’. This is great example of indecisive programming running, perpetually, for years on end, probably still with no end in sight. Most people never actually decide, because deciding is not the goal of the program - its not written into the code. The goal of the indecisive program is INDECISION, TO NOT DECIDE or stated another way to KEEP US IN FEAR - painfully ignorant of TRUST.

By now you are awake and realize that it is not the decision you make that is the problem but the flawed program you are using to try and get there. While indecision will always lead you to feel impulsive and undermine your sense of self trust, TRUST knows that ultimately the decision doesn't really matter. Why? Because whatever direction we go in, there God is.

For Fear: Go Pro and TRUST

GOING PRO: 1) Notice where you're indecisive programming is running? 2) Make a list.

For example:

  • Should I get a job? Quit my job?

  • Should I get married? Break up?

  • Should I punish my kid or let it slide?

  • Should I join a gym?

  • Should I eat that?

  • Should I ____________________

3) With each 'indecisive' area notice how long the program has been running? 2, 5, 10 years?

4) Put on paper the list of pros and cons that have kept you in indecision and inertia all this time.

5) Now rip off the 'con' side and throw it away.

6) Keep your pro lists where you can see and begin to update to the TRUST operating system as follows.

TRUST: 1) Each day, take some time to start integrating these upgrades into you operating system. Be sure to apply it to those areas that have to date been on a permanent path of indecision.

  • Truth: There is no right or wrong decision. (Indecision programming has us believing otherwise)

  • Truth: No moment is better than any other moment. All moments are equal. Judgement is the foundation of in indecision programming and a key force that keeps it running. Without judgement, indecision programming would not exist. God does not judge, so who are we to?

  • Truth: Whether we do or don't it doesn't matter. All is well, all simply is. Again, judgement is the old paradigm, not part of TRUST.

  • Truth: The past and the future do not exist, thus neither can regret or guilt. I can’t stress this enough, there is no such thing as guilt and regret (these are byproducts of the indecision program, not present in TRUST)

  • Truth: There are no consequences, just new moments of experience to experience. We are here to experience every moment of now, not get to the next moment. Living in or for the next moment puts us in the future which at present does not exist. I am not trying to be cute here - it is pure logic.

  • Truth: There are no big or small decisions, they are all the same. Everything is just flow, movement and experience, nothing more.

  • Truth: Nothing is permanent. Everything is forever changing.

So here is how your update will look, for example, in relation to switching jobs: - Truth: There is no right or wrong decision in relation to me switching jobs - Truth: Whether I switch jobs or not doesn't matter. God is good either way.... - Truth: No moment to switch is better than any other moment to switch. Etc….

2) Breathe into all these new truths. Notice where the resistance spikes. Don’t judge the process, just continue with the exercise. 3) For Fun: Create an acronym for the TRUST operating system to help you stay out of indecision. I would love to hear what you come up with.

Once you start moving into TRUST programming, infinite possibilities begin to arise that were not previously available under the old ‘damned if you do damned if you don’t' programming. Keep your eyes open to these miracles. They are the norm. Sometimes you will notice the question or problem completely dissolve. Other times it will work out beyond your wildest dreams with simple ease and grace.

Go with the flow this week and TRUST that you are loved and 100% supported by the universe. Not just sometimes, or when you do the 'right' thing, but always. You are never alone, never forsaken, never wrong, never judged and never separated from your Source and all that is.

Peace and TRUST!!!

Xoxo Jill

*Typos happen but only ego judges :-)

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